Atma Namaste Everyone!
Today’s Quote: “Do not use honesty to hurt other people! Do not use honesty as an excuse to be verbally sadistic.” -GMCKS
Wife: I just bought this new dress, how do I look?
Wife: WHAT! (verge of tears)
Husband: What? I’m just being honest…
Co-worker: Hey Jamie, I just found out something you’re never going to believe.
Co-worker: That you were hired not because of your ability, but because of affirmative action.
Jamie: I can’t believe you just told me that (hurt and furious)
Co-worker: I’d thought you’d want to know, I’m just being honest…
Family Member: Grandma, I’m sorry to tell you your grandson, Will, just died.
Grandma: Oh no! Really…umm, what did he die of?
Family Member: He died of AIDS.
Grandma: I didn’t know Will was gay (saddened Will never shared this)
Family Member: I thought you’d like to know, I’m just being honest.
In all of the above examples, technically, each person was telling the truth but for what reason? And at what cost to the person receiving the truth?
These are examples of people being verbally sadistic or causing mental and emotional harm to others through their words. Each person finished with saying, “I’m just being honest….” as a justification to hurt the other person.
Whether the hurtful words were caused on purpose or accidental doesn’t matter…suffering was created. A wife left feeling unwanted and out of shape, a co-worker feeling minimized and under appreciated and a grandma saddened and disappointed to learn about her deceased grandson not opening up to her about him being gay.
“I’m just being honest…” is not a hall pass to be cruel, harsh or severe with another person. When there’s a question between choosing honesty or loving kindness, loving kindness should prevail.
How could these people have practiced loving kindness and non-injury over honesty and non-lying?
Husband: The dress isn’t flattering to your figure, can I help you pick a better one out?
Co-worker: (says nothing at all)
Family Member: Did you hear about your grandson Will? He just passed away a few hours ago from a severe pneumonia. I’m very sorry for your loss. (which is still practicing honesty)
When one has a very sharp mind yet is impatient and angry…he can cut someone to ribbons with his words. If someone is injured physically, the injury will usually heal in a couple weeks. If someone is injured verbally, it can take YEARS to heal, if at all.
I still remember things my father said to be that was I was a young, impressionable boy. One of the most memorable lines was during a time I was teasing my him in the living room about how he wasn’t such a good wrestler and he said, “I’d drop you like a bad habit.”
Now keep in mind, I understood then, as I do now, that he was ENTIRELY kidding. he even had a big smile on his face when he said it. My father has always shown me love and affection with kind, supportive words. In fact, that comment is really one of the only ‘bad’ things I can remember him ever saying but it STILL negatively impacted my self talk and self image.
The bigger one’s chakras become, the more one MUST watch the words he uses in their day to day interactions with others.
Master Co explained, “For those of you who have been practicing Arhatic Yoga regularly, have you noticed things you once said to friends or family will little response are now getting much greater responses? Even though, its the same words or phrases you’ve always used. Its because your energy is much stronger and HITS with a lot of power, positive words AND negative words alike.”
I realized its much more difficult to tease or critique friends and family because now what I say is really ‘taken to heart.’ I simply thought I was giving productive, clear headed feedback when it fact, my words were being perceived as a verbal assault.
So now, I usually just shut my fat mouth and remain silent…one of the greatest of all spiritual practices.
Use your throat chakra and words to inspire, uplift, educate and heal others…not to belittle, put them in their place, criticize, condemn, or judge. What would be the point anyways? Who cares if your right? If the other person is ‘turned off’ by your approach, she is not going to take your feedback anyways.
I wish I had the time to share the DOZENS of stories in my younger years of trying to convince, conjole, criticize, and condemn others because I wanted to genuinely help them but I NEEDED them to KNOW I WAS RIGHT.
Guess what? Most of them did the OPPOSITE of my recommendations as a nice way of saying, “Mind your own damn business and stop being an asshole.”
So again…I just shut my fat mouth and wait for people to come for healing or guidance, that way they are open and receptive to honesty. Easy peasey.
Besides, I spent many years alienating people…why would I want to continue that by using harsh words that are HONEST but not loving? Loving words are healing, nurturing, nourishing and permeating.
1. Archangel Meditation is this Saturday at 11:45am…ahhh yeah. Come experience the amazing healing energies of the Archangels. We have 4 spots left and you can RSVP right here.
2. Level 1 Pranic Healing class is now on the books and I HIGHLY recommend that you RSVP for it right now. Its an entire weekend of giving healing and receiving healing with MUCHO teachings, tools and blessings. It started my life’s work and I guarantee you’ll love it. Deets and RSVP right here.
3. Cancer Full Moon in da hooooooouse! On Wed. July 1st from 7:00pm to 8:45pm, come join me and a bunch of other folks to experience the most powerful time of the month to meditate. Deets and RSVP right here.
See Ya Sunday!
Denver Twin Hearts Meditation Info:
Why: Physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual healing for you, your family and community.
Where: Downtown Denver YMCA